Things I've learned...

Most of you know me (Ashley) well, and most of you know how random I am. So, here it goes.

1. I was hoping that they would put the mask on me and say, "We'll see you on the other side." I don't think that happened.
2. I have never spent the night in a hospital until June 3, 2010, other than when I was born.
3. Once when my mom was in the hospital a few years ago, I got SO mad that she was not in a private room. I demanded that this change. Well, I spent 7 days with a roommate last week. Karma.
4. Hospital food is terrible. So bad, that I ate a total of probably 6 bites in 7 days.
5. I do not think that someone with a hacking cough who just got out of major abdominal surgery of some sort, had such low blood pressure that they had to check it every 10 minutes, and who didn't respond to the doctors for about 10 hours should say, "Can I go out for a smoke?" as their first words after waking up. (one of my roommates)
6. I do not think that any nurse or doctor believed the lady who said, "I don't know why you are giving me this blood pressure medicine. It's always been normal in the past." I mean, lady, you said this like 35 times in 2 days. I'm sure they caught on. And, if you are going to say your blood pressure is normal, please say 120/80 and not 98/99. Additionally, they told you about 35 times that it is typical for your blood pressure to go up some post-op. (one of my roommates)
7. All my nurses were awesome. All but the one who said, (Friday morning), "Sleep?? You ain't gonna sleep today! You got PT, OT, doctors, surgeons, and blood work!" She didn't know that I would easily win this little disagreement. Luckily, the PT and OT guys, came in and said, "You don't need it. Go to sleep."
8. I'm so bloated right now from surgery, I look 4 months pregnant. It's not comfortable.
9. The good news is, I used to eat like a pig. Now, 5 bites will do it for me.
10. It takes a lot of energy to just tag along on a quick errand.
11. My belly ring may never go back now. Last time I took it out, it closed up in 48 hours.
12. The pain is not what I expected. I had tremendous back pain (due to the bed I think, at first. Now I'm just generally sore, but I would not call the incision site (9 inches or so) painful.
13. The first thing I said when I woke up was, "Why did you do surgery on my shoulder. I didn't need it." The pain I had in my shoulder was about 1,000 times more intense than anything else I have felt since. They said it was because they bent back my ribs so awkwardly. That coupled with a tennis injury, didn't help.
14. I hallucinated with one kind of pain medicine. I saw: Chloe 5 times, writing on walls, violent things, weird doctors, and pictures would change. None of this bothered me, but it bothered the doctors.
15. I itched so badly with another pain medicine. They finally decided on Vicoden. I wasn't a fan of this either due to violent dreams. The other night I gave in, and have decided they do their job pretty well. Bad dreams are gone too.
16. They made me rate my pain on a 1-10 scale. I still don't know how to do this. The lady next to me always said 9. I always said 2. I think the highest I got was a 6.